Life without Leo
by The ORIGINAL Corky
Summary: Leo sees what his brothers lives would be like if he'd never been hatched. ::Third story in my TMNT Christmas Miracle Series::


Disclaimer: Don't own Leonardo or his brothers…though I _still_ wish I did. ::Sighs:: Maybe for Christmas Santa will bring them to me. :0) Oh! Also…I don't own the song, "I'm Getting Nuttin' for Christmas" either…not sure who does but I know who sang it…Barry Gordon (Who for you trivia junkies like myself…is better known as the voice of the original 1980's DONATELLO!!! Cute huh?).

Author's Note: I was originally gonna write Mikey's Christmas story first but then as I started thinking about it, I realized it wouldn't make much sense since it would take place after Dark Shadow and I haven't even written Dark Shadow yet. So…I opted for the not so original approach and wrote Leo's. I realize the whole "It's A Wonderful Life" approach has been well more than over used but…I couldn't help myself. And besides, you can never go wrong with a classic, right? Right…so, yeah. Anyways…enjoy and HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

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Leo's POV

I knew it was asking a lot of my brothers to make them leave their families to go patrol on Christmas Eve, but we had to; crime doesn't take a break just because it's a holiday. Their wives weren't exactly thrilled with me either. Especially Julie since only a few weeks prior she'd given birth to her and Don's first daughter Delaney. Oh well, we do what we must to help protect the city and their families. They knew that when they met us. It was their choice to accept it.

The night started off simple enough; Mike and Don were giving Raph a hard time for making his wife Angela mad at him on Christmas Eve and Don had even gone so far as to start singing the song we learned as youngsters and had declared Raph's theme song.

"Oh, I'm getting nuttin' for Christmas. Mommy and daddy are mad. I'm getting nuttin' for Christmas. 'Cuz I ain't been nuttin' but bad."

"Stick it, Don." Raph had muttered as we jumped from one roof to another. We were all having a fairly good time and I'm ashamed to say that even my defenses had lapsed slightly; enough to not pick up on the danger waiting for us on that last rooftop.

Like any ambush, the attackers leaped from nowhere and managed to catch us unaware. We fought long and we fought hard but in the end it was no good. More and more attackers emerged from the wood work and it seemed as if for every one we took out five more took their place. I had two choices: stay and have my brothers and I completely destroyed or call for a retreat while we all could still move. We'd each acquired serious injuries that were in fact slowing us down considerably and from the looks of things, if either Raph or Don were hit once more on the head, they'd be down for the count.

Deciding there was no shame in trying to save my brother's lives; I gave the call to retreat and stood watch as each of them dropped from the roof to the dark street below before I followed. Mike was struggling to keep the manhole cover open for me and I could tell he'd gotten a painful injury to his wrist and arm. We looked as if we'd just insulted every heavy weight champ and WWE wrestler and in my heart I knew it was my fault. If I'd been paying attention and not singing that stupid song with Mike and Don, I would have sensed the danger and maybe things would be different.

I watched as my brothers limped and hobbled into the lair and into the arms of their anxiously waiting wives. The looks I got from them was enough to make me forget my own injuries and turn to leave once more. It was clear they all blamed me for their injuries and were in no mood to see me at the moment.

I moved back into the freezing cold sewer tunnel and listened to the dripping water hit the ice around me. Moving to the main drainage compartment, I sat on the ledge and sighed heavily. I was to blame for all my brother's injuries, every injury they'd ever gotten had been my fault. Me and my stupid pride. Sometimes I couldn't help but feel as if their lives would be better off if I'd never been hatched.

"Would they really? I don't think they would. But, what do I know? I'm not you so…"

I jumped as the sound of a voice I hadn't heard in many, many years echoed through the sewers. It couldn't have been him. He'd only been a figment of my imagination; a friend I never once admitted to having for fear of ridicule from my brothers.

"Patrick?" I questioned without even a second thought. I heard an unmistakable laugh as a shimmer appeared next to me and a small grasshopper emerged from the light.

"No, Leo, I'm not Patrick. Sorry. But he sends his best regards. My name is Simkin. Simkin Spier Morse the Third if we must get technical. But I'm not here for me, I'm here for you."

I looked at the little guy as if he'd grown a second head.

"You're here for me? What for?"

"I'm here to show you just what your brother's lives would be like if you really hadn't been hatched."

I laughed and shook my head. I must have been hurt worse than I'd originally thought.

"Sorry Simkin—"

"Simi, please."

"Oook then, Simi, I'm sorry but, I've seen 'It's A Wonderful Life' before…"

"Well then you know that they _wouldn't_ be better off without you."

I sighed and shook my head again as I moved to stand up.

"George Bailey's family wasn't, but mine would be, trust me. They wouldn't keep getting hurt and Raph could finally be leader like he always wanted to be."

Simkin tsked his tongue at me and shook his head. Jumping up, he landed on my shoulder and looked up at me.

"If you really believe that Leo, boy are you in for a big surprise."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Simkin shrugged and pointed back towards the lair.

"Well, lets go find out, shall we?"

Rolling my eyes, I turned and moved back to our home. It was amazing that I wasn't limping anymore and that the throbbing pain that had been in my arm was gone. I shrugged it off though and figured it was just my ninja training kicking in to shield the pain from my mind. As we walked though, I noticed all of Donnie's hidden cameras were turned off.

"Strange, Don never turns those things off." I muttered more to myself than anyone else.

"Turns what off?"

"His security cams."

"There are none."

I stopped short and turned my head to look at him.

"What are you talking about? Of course there are. Don's got them set up every five feet on either side of these walls."

Simkin tsked again and shook his head at me once more. "Not now he doesn't. Remember? I'm showing you what it'd be like if you'd never hatched."

"Yeah, sure. I forgot."

We continued on and as we did I sensed the ever increasing cold that was seeping down through the cracked walls and drainage holes. It was colder down there than it had been earlier. As we reached the lair, I paused and looked around.

"Where is it? Where's the lair?"

"You haven't got one. Well, at least not right here. Their lair is down this way. Follow me." Simkin leaped from my shoulder and started down a darker tunnel. I followed closely behind and shivered as the cold seeped through my tough reptilian skin.

Finally, we came upon a broken wooden door with a soft light peeking through the cracks. Simkin waved for me to follow him as he hopped through the door. I watched as he went through the door as if it weren't there and then poked his head back through again.

"Well? You coming or not?"

"How did you—"

"Easy, it's not really here. None of it is…just images. Now c'mon!"

I raised an eye ridge and gave a reluctant shrug as I walked in. the lair Simkin brought me to looked nothing like our warm and loving home. There were no toys scattered everywhere, no Christmas tree decorated in gum wrapper chains and multi-colored lights, and no high tech gadgets lining the walls and floors. In fact, there was nothing that said it was even our lair to begin with.

I watched as Simkin hopped onto a shelf and looked around sadly.

"Kinda lonesome, ain't it?"

"Yeah, I suppose it is. What is it?" I asked as I looked around some more. There weren't even any photographs up on the walls.

"This is your brothers' home."

"Where is everyone?"

Simkin shrugged and looked around again. A sound from the corner caught my attention and I turned to see what had caused it. A single tin can rolled out from the darkness followed by a crude curse. I recognized that voice anywhere.

"Raph?"

Another curse came from the darkness followed by the sounds of squeaky wheels. The sound increased as a figure emerged. What I saw made my jaw drop. Raphael sat in a battered old wheelchair, his face scared and mangled and knobby stubs where legs had once been stuck out from the seat.

"Raph? What happened to you?! You were fine when I left!" I exclaimed as he rolled past me slowly.

"He can't hear you, Leo. Remember, just images."

I was really starting to grow tired of that little guy. I watched in horror as Raph rolled over to a make shift couch and struggled to pull himself up onto it. As he did, he groaned and flopped back against the arm of it. That struggle alone was enough to exhaust him. Taking in heavy gulps of air, Raph finally pulled himself up right and looked at the battered and broken television screen before him. Reaching out, he clicked it on and frowned as static filled the screen.

"Stupid re-runs…" He muttered before turning it off again. I couldn't believe how defeated he seemed to be.

"What happened to him?" I questioned softly. I was afraid to hear the answer but knew that I had to hear it.

"You weren't there to save him from the sewer gator when you were younger. He fought it the best he could but by the time your Master Splinter had been able to locate him, he was struggling to stay alive. The gator cost him his legs and the sight in his left eye. See? You had been the one to pressure point that sewer gator and put him to sleep, therefore saving your brother's life. Without you…well…he'll never be leader now even if he could." Simkin shrugged again and watched as the door we'd just come through opened and in stepped a cloaked figure.

"Hey Raph. I couldn't find any dry wood but…I did find some of Splinters old books and…and Don's bo-staff. It'll at least keep us warm for the night." The tired voice said as it closed the door and trudged into the middle of the room. Dropping the books and small staff to the floor, I couldn't help but wonder who the new comer was. They sounded slightly like Mikey but, then again not.

"Thanks Mike. Any luck with food?"

My jaw dropped again as I watched the cloaked figure remove their jacket and pull out two small bundles from the pockets. I couldn't have been Mikey. They looked far too old and the fun and laughter were gone from their blue eyes. But, how many other mutant turtles named Mike were there?

"I found a few scraps here and there. Luckily I was able to sneak into the soup line and nab a bowl. I split it in two so…here's your half…and some bread." He said as he set one bundle on Raphael's lap before taking his own smaller portions into what I guessed was the kitchen.

"Simi? Where's Donnie and Splinter? Why didn't Mike bring enough food for them? And why did he go out to look for food? Why didn't he just order a pizza?" I questioned as I turned to face the small grasshopper who was looking sadly at the scene before us.

"Mikey has been going out scavenging for most of his life. He's had to take care of Raph ever since Master Splinter was killed by the mousers."

I felt my eyes go wide and my blood run cold.

"That's a lie! Splinter was never killed by the mousers! He defeated them! He defeated them and found us our new lair."

"No, Splinter was killed by the mousers because there was no one there to help fend them off. Just like your brother Donatello died trying to retrieve his remote control car when it fell into the rushing waters. You hadn't been there to save him from going over the edge and no one knew where he was to begin with. When he didn't return…"

I shook my head and closed my eyes. It was all just a bad dream. I was going to open my eyes and everything would be back to normal. Quickly spinning to face Simkin again, I open my eyes and narrowed them threateningly.

"You're lying to me. Donatello never died! He's alive! And he has a wife named Julie and a beautiful little daughter named Delaney. Just like Michelangelo has a wife named Gwen and twins. And Raph—"

"Julie was also killed out side the Rocky Street Grill a year and a half ago. You weren't there to save Donnie so he wasn't there to save her. As for Gwen…well…since Mikey had no reason to leave home he never met Gwen, doesn't even know she existed. Gwen was found raped and murdered along with her dog in her home. They never caught her killer. As for Angela…she's still in Illinois, working at a grocery store as a cashier.

See Leo? You're just like George Bailey was…you're life touches so many others…and so many lives depended upon you being there. Raphael's, Donatello's, Splinter's, Julie, Gwen, Angela…even Mikey. Mikey is nothing like you know him as today. In this life he's been beaten down by life, his free-spirited will and soul broken. He's almost like Scrooge really. Notice there's no Christmas tree up? No decorations? Mike always was the one to do that, wasn't he?"

I nodded as I watched the scene in front of me start to fade out into darkness. I'd never been afraid of the dark before, but this had that strange foreboding feeling about it; the feeling that something somewhere wasn't right. I looked back at Simkin who hopped back onto my shoulder sighed.

"Well, now Mikey wants nothing to do with Christmas. C'mon though…I have to show you something else. See, your brothers and father and their wives and such weren't the only ones affected by you being there. You're friends also needed you around."

The light came back in front of us and I saw that we were standing in an empty parking lot with barbed wire fence all the way around it. The neighborhood looked slightly familiar, but I wasn't exactly sure why or how.

"Where are we?" I asked softly.

"You mean you don't recognize it? This is April O'Neil's home. Yup…you are standing where her antique shop was…probably about near the check out counter actually. Without you guys to patrol the city, and without your leadership, the city has been over run by Purple Dragons and The Foot. Shredder now rules over the city with an iron fist. April missed one single payment to them so they burnt her building to the ground." He paused and pointed to a cardboard box hidden in the corner.

"That's her home now. And she actually got off easy. She could have been sent to one of Shredders many training camps where she would have either been beaten into submission to join the Foot, or just simply beaten to death. Which was the case with Casey Jones. He's now one of the most feared and respected of all the Foot members."

My mind was racing as I looked around the dingy city. Crime was through the roof and innocent people were being ruled over by a man with no honor or soul. I could hardly think straight. Maybe Simkin was right, maybe my family was better off with me around. If what this little grasshopper had been showing me was true, then it's a good thing I was hatched. Turning, I began running for the nearest manhole cover I could find.

"Where are you going?" Simkin called from behind me. I glanced over my shoulder and gave a small smile.

"Home, where I belong."

I ran through the sewers as quickly as I could. As I did, I felt the temperature rising as things returned to normal. The small blinking red lights appeared at the top of the tunnels and our make shift job of filling in the cracks and holes to keep the cold out were back where they once were.

Skidding to a halt in front of our lair, I smiled brightly as I heard the soft voices through the wall. Opening the door, I smiled brightly as I entered and heard the door slide shut behind me. My brothers were all in the living room, each with bandages around their injuries but also holding presents they were placing carefully under the tree. As I slid down the railing of our stairs to land with a soft thud in the living room, they all turned to look at me as if I had lost my mind. Laughing, I ran up to them each and gave them hugs—something I hadn't done in quite a long time.

"Whoa! Whaddya t'ink yer doin' Leo?! Get yer hands off me!" Raph exclaimed as he pushed me back. I expected that much from him so I only laughed and moved onto Donnie—who was confused but hugged me back none-the-less.

"Hey…Leo, you're limping pretty badly and your arm is bleeding. You better let me take a look at those." He said. Good old Donnie! I laughed again and shook my head as I saw Mikey lean over to Raph and whisper.

"I think Leon's drunk or something…"

"I'm not drunk, Mikey. I'm just…happy to see you guys and see that you're all ok."

"Of course we're ok, Leo. Why wouldn't we be?" Don asked as he set a tiny present under the tree for our nephew Cassidy. I smiled a little more and shook my head.

"Nothing…never mind. Uh…heh…Merry Christmas, guys."

My three younger brothers all looked at each other in confusion before shrugging and looking back at me. I knew they all thought I'd gotten one too many hits to the head during the battle, but I knew the truth. I was as lucky to have them for a family as they were to have me as a brother. Guess the saying's true then, we all really are put on this earth for a purpose…and sometimes to the world you may only be one person, but to one person you could be the world.

"Merry Christmas, Leo."


End file.
